Day 4: My Favorite Photograph of My Best Friend

I love this picture of Kev. It has his killer smile in it, and the best part is he's looking at me with that smile :) I love him so much. This day was one of the proudest moments in my life. I'm proud and happy to support him in his decision to join the Army. <3

Day 3: My Idea of the Perfect First Date

The perfect first date...gonna have to go with mine and Kevin's first date. We went to his house and he played me some guitar songs then we went bowling. It was great, even though I hate bowling. I hate wearing shoes a million other people (with God knows what going on on their feet) have worn, and sticking my fingers in bowling balls that a million other people have touched with their hands (that have picked their nose, coughed into their hands, wiped their unmentionables and not washed etc you get the point.) blech. Nothing about bowling is appealing. Kevin was so sweet and funny throughout the whole night though, he really made the night enjoyable. I really fell for him that first night, and was hooked since!


Short but sweet post :)

Day 2: Favorite Movie

Hands down my favorite movie is "300". Not even a hard question. The cinematography is beautiful (LOVE that golden filter), the story is great (I love ancient Greece), and the people in the movie...GORGEOUS. Who doesn't like to see a bunch of sexy sculpted men in as little as possible proving their manhood by taking out a huge army of their evil foes? I think Frank Miller and Zack Snyder are genius'. Zack has directed 300, Watchmen, Suckerpunch, & Dawn of the Dead (remake). He's amazing! Love that movie.


and remember THIS IS SPARTA!!!

Great quotes from the movie:

"Come back with your shield, or on it" (Queen Gorgo says this to Leonidas before he leaves, I said it to Kevin before he left hahaah!)

"It's just an eye. God saw fit to grace me with a spare."

"Our arrows, will block out the sun..." "Then we will fight in the shade."

"You see old friend, I brought more soldiers than you did."

"Only Spartan women give birth to real men."

30 Day Challenge

30 Day Blog Challenge
day one: my favorite song
day two: my favorite movie
day three: my idea of the perfect first date
day four: my favorite photograph of my best friend
day five: how important do i think education is?
day six: a photo of an animal I'd love to keep as a pet
day seven: my dream wedding
day eight: a song to match my mood
day nine: a photo of the item i last purchased
day ten: a photo of my favorite place to eat
day eleven: what is in my makeup bag?
day twelve: my current relationship, and if single discuss how my single life is
day thirteen: my views on drugs and alcohol
day fourteen: a TV show i am currently addicted to
day fifteen: something i don't leave the house without
day sixteen: my view on homosexuality
day seventeen: how i hope my future will be like
day eighteen: five things that irritate me about the opposite/same sex
day nineteen: my reflection in the mirror
day twenty: the meaning behind my blog name
day twenty one: a photo of something that makes me happy
day twenty two: a letter to someone who has hurt me recently
day twenty three: fifteen facts about me
day twenty four: a photo of something that means a lot to me
day twenty five: who am i?
day twenty six: a photo of somewhere i want to go
day twenty seven: what kind of person attracts me?
day twenty eight: in this past month, what have i learned?
day twenty nine: something i could never get tired of doing
day thirty: a photograph of myself today and three good things that have happened in the past thirty days



Day One:

My favorite song...This is a tough one, I have so many. Right now I'd have to say my favorite song is "Wait For Me" by Theory of a Deadman. It means a lot to me, makes me miss my husband and think of him while he's away. Brings me to tears every time I hear it. Waiting for him has been the hardest thing I've ever done, it's made me grow everyday.

Life's Unexpected Moments

I've known I was pregnant again for sometime now. Feelings of being scared, and not thinking I could handle another one have now been taken over by the hope for a daughter, I actually went out and bought a cute little dress for her even though I was only 10 weeks. Then, I woke up one morning and knew something was wrong. I'm currently going through the second miscarriage in my life. While it's emotionally and physically draining, I'm also relieved. I only gave birth to my son 2.5 months ago, that's a little soon for me. I'm mourning this loss, but also rejoicing in the beautiful sons I have here with me. It has made me cling to them even more (if that's possible) and tell them I love them more times in a day (again, if that's possible). I have had great support from my Mom, and sisters (who are taking turns bringing me dinner and taking the boys for a few hours). I'm so lucky to have a family that rally's around when times get tough. I wish Kevin was here, he's been down this road with me before and it'd be lovely to have him here. I miss him so much it hurts, but I know that this year is just a blip on our 80 year road (yes thats right K I'm forcing you to live to 99, but I'll be 100 so deal lol). I miss Louisiana now more than ever and cant wait to get back to my friends. I'm just said that I got close to some of them AFTER I'd left.

So to all the pillars of strength in my life, thank you. I love you.

Wait For Me

You are not alone tonight
Imagine me there by your side
It's so hard to be here so far away from you
I'm counting the days till
I'm finally done
I'm counting them down, yeah, one by one
It feels like forever till I return to you
But it helps me on those lonely nights
It's that one thing that keeps me alive

[Chorus:]
Knowing that you wait for me
Ever so patiently

No one else knows the feeling inside
We hang up the phone without saying goodnight
Because it's the sound of your voice that brings me home
It's never been easy to say
But it's easier when I've gone away

[Chorus:]
Knowing that you wait for me
Ever so patiently
Yeah, you're everything I've ever dreamed of having and
It's everything I need from you just knowing that you wait for me

[Bridge:]
What I'd give
What I'd do
Knowing I'm not there for you
Makes it so hard to leave
What I'd give
What I'd do
Anything to get me home to you
And this time I'll stay

And you wait for me
Ever so patiently
Yeah, you're everything I've ever dreamed of having and
It's everything I need from you just knowing that you wait for me

Feeling Like A Bad Mom, and Trying To Feel Better

I feel like a failure as a Mother lately. There are days where I just can't seem to keep my son under control, keeping us eating healthy and keeping myself well rested. I feel overwhelmed by housework, cooking meals, changing diapers and paying bills. I constantly compare myself to my older sister and how well behaved her kids are. It's hard to raise a toddler and a new baby at the same time, late nights caused by the latter make it hard to wake up early because of the former.

I started watching "Desperate Housewives" tonight, and while I know it's a TV I've found someone I can relate to, Felicity Huffman's character, Lynette Scalvo. She's an overwhelmed frazzled mom, my soul sister. Suddenly I felt better about how my son behaves and how I try and deal with my everyday life. She has points where she doesn't know what to do to get her boys under control, and even resorts to some desperate (no pun intended) crazy measures. (I/E: leaving them on the sidewalk in her neighborhood to try and get them to behave in the car, "if you can't behave, you can't ride") Finally, someone else who didn't seem to always have the answers of how to deal with a toddler.

I thought, if someone wrote this character, maybe someone else had been there. I feel better, I've found someone to connect with, and can relate to. So yes, my kid my have melt downs, temper tantrums and misbehave from time to time. He may eat peanut butter sandwiches and corn dogs more often than most kids. I may be sleep deprived and nod off during the day occasionally and may not play with him 24/7, but that's ok, I love my son. I teach him to count and his colors, I cuddle with him and read to him. They're both fed, rested, warm and adjusted...and I'm a good mom.

What A Week!

Since last Friday (4/29/2011) my world has been rocky and unstable. I keep waiting for me to find my bearings again, but so far to no avail. On April 27,2011 a young man was killed in Afghanistan, he was a friend of my husband. He was only 20 years old- just a baby. It hit me hard, it brought reality to my doorstep. People were out there near my husband dying and being seriously injured- he was in danger. I'd been able to deal with this whole deployment thing fairly well up to this point because it was winter and the locals stay shut inside their little mud huts, dreaming of the sun and the day they can put our men in harms way. Well, now their dreams are coming to fruition and we are left to pick up the pieces.

I've had so many moments this week (which in case you were wondering has felt like a MONTH)of just sitting on the floor in my kitchen and crying. R & R was wonderful, and horrible. It has made me feel the hole where Kevin usually is even more, and made me ache to have him home with us where he belongs. I am so incredibly proud of my husband (and the men around him) for doing what he is doing- but dammit, this sucks. I want him home watching our new son smile for the first time, roll over and laugh. I want him home to rough house with our oldest boy and to be here for me. Then I remember he's out there doing this for all the men and women who will never come home. He's doing it so he CAN come home to safety and be with us. He's doing it to protect us. I remember these things, pull myself off the floor and keep going.

I want him home, but not at the cost of someone else's life. I don't want him to find any excuse to come home, they need him out there. I'm ok, I'm strong...Army Wife Strong and I can do this.

below are a selection of army wife quotes:

"Army Wife, You try doing this shit."

"Army Wife; I live, breathe and walk amongst the bravest of heroes"

"Army Wife; sucking it up & driving on"